That pesky voice inside our heads can be both a friend and a foe. It whispers encouragement when we need courage, yet far too often it delivers doubt, shame, guilt or criticism. What we sometimes forget is that the voice we hear is not only shaped by our own thoughts but also by the words we consume from others and the words we direct toward ourselves.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again,”words matter”. They have a way of taking hold in us. Strangely, the negative ones seem to cling far more stubbornly than the positive. A passing comment about our appearance, an offhand critique at work, or even our own self-criticism can replay in our minds for years. Meanwhile, genuine compliments and kind affirmations often slide away almost unnoticed, as if our minds are wired to discount them. This imbalance is not just an annoyance it shapes how we see ourselves. If we allow the negative voice to dominate, self-acceptance feels like an impossible dream. But if we nurture the positive, if we give weight to encouragement, gratitude, and compassion, that same inner voice can become our greatest ally. Self-belief unfortunately doesn’t come from a single inspiring word or phrase it comes from consistently choosing which words we allow to live rent-free in our heads.

The challenge is not to silence the voice but to train it. To gently question the harsh words, to stop amplifying every criticism, and to make room for kindness in our own self-talk. Imagine what would happen if we gave as much attention to the positive as we do to the negative. We don’t always have control over what others say to us, but we do have a say in what we repeat to ourselves. That choice of what voice we strengthen may be the single most powerful factor in shaping the life we live.